ibnay somnia

too much timbuctoo in THEE blood to sleep with. therefore goggly eyes sharpen on steely light dat somewhat seemeth to be too intense...itchy mouth. i haff this cuzin who is always QUITE happy...what willed if SHE WUZ not so happy? hopefully never to be seeing such sad times. imagine all the peepul...living inside of me...woohoo hoo hoo...you may say, i'm a dreamer...but i am not the only one...i hope someday will join us...so we don't have ALL THESE creative differences all THAAA fudging time...know what i meander? itchy.
today...i went on a ride...bike it was...with motor and all...wind in my face...blue the blues awAY.

i made my kitten's bed once
with a load of sappy stuff
there were all these gay ribbons
and a hell of a lot of fluff.

mein frauline squished the kitsy
that's how my kittens bled
i guess i'll go get a dog now
this kitten seems to be dead.

lickiting on the furry head
lickity little tongue
upon its hind legs dances
and frolics in the dung

juicy americana
swedes is hotter shit by far
what a waste this bed of mine.
when kitten run over by a car.

all grey it was and lovely
with eyes of orange peel
squishy sounds and tires pass
now tell me how you feel?

i held my kitten in my arm
and saw it bleed to death
i saw it dance this freaky dance
until it lost its breath.

you know i could do this forever
make cheap rhymes out of crap
but honestly i feel i should
go get me a power nap.

so anyhoo in closing
as i forget this sordid tale
this poem was about a kitten
that once belonged to martin pale.

wish there was a job that required that i churn out nonsense that rhymed...and use too many "that" in one sentence. cats i like. they are funny. and very life like too. one of my friends once gave a cat a hand job...with tissue paper of course...i assume he's a cat lover too. large dogs that come too close to my private parts are scary...haha...the feel of your toothless gums stirs up a lot of passion in my loins...i have two loins to be honest...ahem
a lion with a loin is a mane
a loin with a lion is a mane
a mane with a loin is a lion
a mane with a lion is a loin
a mane with a mayan with a lane with a lion is a lane.

right so now then that's all cleared...this is what we do...we detox for a few days...because we are in dire need of it...we ask the high priestess for some xanax...and we go to bed...we do not wake up for a very long time...and also remember...there was this dream you had about a lot of funny stuff that you're supposed to write down...actually you wrote it down but now you need to read it and make it coherent. now go before the wind takes you away from us. remember...beauty is only skin deep...but a large penis goes deeper.
drummers are excellent people...they are not like the rest of the band...some bands can't cope with that...so they get a ringo star...which is basically a monkey with two sticks and a drum set, and a better sense of rhythm than i could ever have...i mean even if i jump up a black woman's hoohoo...and come out again as a black guy...i'd still never have a good sense of rhythm...only black people...with a few exceptions...are black.
if i write mostly jackovsky material...i bet i could come up with a book in a month...maybe 2 months...but definitely a book of pages and numbers...because pages and numbers are excellent...when you start reading...you get the urge to look at the last page number...see how far this egocentric maniac is going to babble...then when you get to the middle of the book...you hoot and dance unless the book is interesting...in which case you read on...as the second fatness endethes...you get to the end...you realise that it was a complete waste of time...you pick up lord of the rings...or alice in wunderbra...if it strikes your fancy...and she does...and then you go back to reading...but in actual life you're just thinking about reading...whilst typing...dude...DO SOMETHING...for the love of God...it's a good thing that your life isn't televised...or they'd wonder what you do in the toilet for so long.

i wake up fine and then go to sleep
for beauty is SADLY not skin deep
when it hits you full blast on the balls
it makes you tear down all your walls

now if you're smart and i'm sure you're not
you'll hold on to your dick and pray that you're hot
sadly if it doesn't work...you can come and join me.
there's always room for a bit more ugly...

imagine a lot of razor blades
imagine improvements made
the things that you would stoop to
just so that you can get laid.

i will pick from out of the crowd
somebody who has begun to fade
and we'll walk through this way
and out the door called "somedaylade."

somebody has got to sexplain to me...this...bantering...CHILDREN WILL GO THE HELL TO SLEEP NOW.
about that dream...you DO remember the best part right?
there's some difference of opinion about which part was best...BUT...i remember all the nominees...therefore...it's all good...personally...we liked the part with thaaaa saxual tenseeowne...hahahaha...lean in...lean in goddamnit...should've leant in...sighman gets no hymen. gross. hahahaha.

oh gorgeous one with luscious lips
who sails past like haunted ships
stop thine love making to the inanimate
give a chance to this bloody git.

oh gorgeous one what vocabulary defies
all these words are horny lies
truth be told you're better still
in a bujillion years i couldn't get my fill.

born she was on a day like this
and when she dies we'll surely miss
her sister's friend...because she was hot
oh luscious one...you are so not...

ok fine you have the lead
but i have my agenda filled with greed
so when you hump and think of me
tell your husband, you came indeed.

mechanical sex is all you'll get
says the boy who lost the bet
sour grapes and onions too
to those who refused this lonely jew.

right...dude...go to bed...now...before i kill you myself...the tobacco is in your mind...go to sleep...please...gentlemen don't curse imaginary girls to mechanical sex...right so then that's covered too...good night woolium.