genetic pot-luck

one is an open book, easy to read everytime you look
the other has eyes that give away nothing. and i am a bit of both.
both of them say that they love me...which is kind of gross...
but the sincerity of it all is unbelievably satisfying.
so i always say, "you're sick!!!! and obviously lying."
she says to me, "we're not crazy...we're just a bit creative."
i laugh and i say, "yeah i know...but then again what if??"
she says to me, "i have a lot of stories in my head too...entire novels, very detailed...i've added to them over the years...and i will take them to my grave."
so i say, "can't you articulate your thoughts, is that why you always save?"
and she answers, "no darling...they're too porno. really sexy people live inside my head...nobody will find out because i never said."
her power is undiluted whilst i have a bit of the open book.
she can remain insanely expressionless, won't say what her mind can cook.
it's strange that both of them have earned their final reward and even though i have everything i am farther away from God...it's a shame because i am both, so i should be stronger still...instead i am just confused and living on a pill.